Utopiax

Over and out. | April 18, 2006

Today is a monday. Another sleep-depriven day, that everyone sheepishly drags their carcasses around school. I can say the same for myself, except, today, I was different.  I wasn't in the crowd today, I was just there.  I was drifting…not really paying attention.  Why really express what I feel when no one wants to hear about it in this crap world? I do have feelings here. It's just that at the tip of all the loving compassion in my being, I have a hole, that's been ripped open by the past, letting my emotions ooze over everything. I guess you can say I an impassionate now. So much of my love was spread, that there is none left to be given.  I've tried so hard in my life to be great and sympathetic, but, why should I give so much, when what I need is someone to give to me? My dreams have been shattered too many times, yet I just picked up the pieces again, and travelled on.  I'm just so damn tired from travelling that path. I'm ready to be impressed, and inspired to carry on with my life. Right now it's just…there, with nothing as the filling part of my body. Just a lump in a world of lumps that is full of crap. Ohhh, so vulgar. Bleh.

I miss the good ol' days. But, I don't really, because I don't remember what those days were. I never had any before.

 The world and life can be so complicated at times. I wish I could understand. But, then I would be selfish and not tell anyone about it.  My own secret, that no one else would comprehend.  I just don't know anymore.

I'm over.

P.S.- Excuse my rambling, if you do care.

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1 Comment »

  1. Mabye someone wants to give you something. Cheer up, for there are those of us who do care about you and your well-being. You were missed today.

    Comment by You know. — April 18, 2006 @ 2:38 am


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